Did you know...?

I'm a lover of weird facts. Even though by the time I walk the twenty feet from the living room into the kitchen, I might forget what I went in there for, I'll remember that, for example, the dot over the letter "i" is called a "dittle."

Go figure.

Maybe my fascination with irrelevant and often useless trivia comes from growing up during the Golden Age of TV Game Shows. After all, as a child I learned that knowing an odd fact or two (Jeopardy), or having a fishing lure handy in your purse (Let's Make a Deal), or being able to guess the word "oyster" from a clue like "slimy things inside shells" (25,000 Pyramid), or knowing the manufacturer's retail price of a can of beans (The Price is Right) might someday make you pseudo-famous, and put a nice fat check in your pocket.

Or get you a goat, depending on whether you got greedy and eschewed the box for what was behind Curtain Number One.

Personally, I was always rooting for the goat.

Anyway, my brain virtually teems with useless information. Useless, I say, because really, how often in life do you need to know that, unless you're a contortionist, it's impossible to lick your elbow? Or that eating lobster before the twentieth century was a mark of poverty because they looked like insects, and their name in Latin means "locust." Or that polar bears are left-handed, and elephants are the only animals that can't jump?

You're trying to lick your elbow, aren't you? Stop that.